


Losing Face

by GoodbyeBlueMonday



Category: Ouran High School Host Club - All Media Types
Genre: Drabble, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 02:30:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3511871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoodbyeBlueMonday/pseuds/GoodbyeBlueMonday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kyoya knew how he felt about Tamaki. That didn't mean he had to be happy about it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Losing Face

Kyoya watched Tamaki flit around the new girls. A group of giggling first-years had entered the Club for the first time, and of course, the Host King was in his element. He fawned all over them as he described the "types" of boys they had, while ensuring with his manner of description that they'd all pick him. Kyoya smirked in their direction. Tamaki had a way with that, didn't he?

 _Well, he sure fooled you,_ a voice in the back of his head said. Kyoya tutted at it, returning to his work, but he knew that wouldn't chase it away forever. It always came about, at the most inopportune moments, to remind Kyoya Ootori that he had no right to feel superior to the girls.

Yes, Kyoya knew firsthand just how strong Tamaki's charms could be. Because he'd fallen for them himself. He didn't believe it for so long, his first impression being that Tamaki was pushy and annoying--and he still believed that, of course. But there was something else to the Host King, something that penetrated even Kyoya's steely armor. Was it his endless compassion? His knack for seeing through people's masks? That he'd always listened carefully when Kyoya was having issues with his family? That he was the only one who knew of Kyoya's stresses over that--that Tamaki knew him better than anyone?

Tamaki was never the sort of person Kyoya could see himself befriending. Yet Tamaki had danced his way past all of Kyoya's assumptions, earning his friendship and much more. What that "much more" entailed....Kyoya didn't like to dwell on.

But he couldn't deny it. Kyoya was smart and calculating, and he knew exactly what those feelings were. He'd spent too many lonely nights with his mind wandering to Tamaki's hair, Tamaki's eyes, Tamaki's  _lips_ , what they would  _taste like..._

Yes, Kyoya knew enough about human sexuality to know what those feelings meant.

The worst was when Tamaki turned his charm on the girls, in front of his best friend. People wondered why he sat behind his computer, looking disinterested. Kyoya would never tell them, but it was because, well, he  _had_ to pretend. There's no way he could let it slip what he thought of watching that routine, wishing it were directed at him...wanting to know what it was like on the  _other end_ of the Host King's romantic gestures, words and roses. It would shatter everyone's image of him, make it all a lie.

Besides, the whole thing was just so  _silly_. Even if it wasn't  _really_ an act for Tamaki, Kyoya knew the whole fantasy was ridiculous. It was so... _irrational_ and  _senseless_ for Kyoya to be caught up in such things. And the one thing an Ootori must never do is take leave of their senses. Yet, around Tamaki, Kyoya seemed to take leave of everything...

"Is something wrong, Kyoya-senpai?"

Kyoya looked behind him, to see Haruhi standing behind him with a concerned look.

Ah, Haruhi. She was the other complicating variable. It was pretty clear that Tamaki was... _different_ around Haruhi, _different_ in a way that gave Kyoya strange longings in his chest. Painful ones. Like he was about to lose everything, and he wouldn't let it go so easily.

Was that what he was feeling now?  _Possessive?_ Of a man who'd never been his? Kyoya had wondered some times, when Tamaki squirmed particularly close to him under the kotatsu. When he'd embraced him for tighter and longer than usual. But Tamaki did the same things to the twins, didn't he? Maybe not as much, since they weren't quite as close, but Tamaki was an affectionate person. If Kyoya got more of it, it was purely due to proximity and familiarity.

And now he had someone else to share it with, and Kyoya didn't believe for a second it was because of this "daughter" nonsense. No, there was no reason to hope for more from Tamaki. He was a good friend, but that's all he would ever be to Kyoya.

Why should Kyoya hope for more, anyway? That wasn't what he wanted. He didn't even like this crush, so of course he didn't want to act on it.

Did he?

"No, I'm fine, Haruhi. Why do you ask?"

"I don't know, senpai, you just seemed...not yourself. You looked lost."

"Ah," Kyoya said as he turned away. "That's an intriguing notion, I suppose."

Haruhi snorted. "I should have known it was nothing. You say that about everything, senpai."

"Not quite," Kyoya said, but she was out of earshot. Oh well. He was saying it more for himself than her, anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> I purposefully didn't tag this as "one-sided attraction" or anything like that, because I wanted to leave it up to the reader whether or not Kyoya's feelings are requited.


End file.
